How to keep your Budding Relationship alive
Budding relationships are bittersweet. You are hopefully closing chapters of your past while anxiously waiting for your future. It seems that every emotion is heightened when you first start dating someone new; especially if you really like them. You may find yourself falling into lust rapidly, making it more difficult to point out red flags in the beginning. New relationships are full of fun adventures, brand new experiences, butterflies, and feelings of completeness. During this time you may find yourself saying that this person is the one and then months later thanking the lord that you got away.
Men and women experience relationships with drastic differences. In this time, people think that relationships are trash and dating around is much more fun. This is making it strenuous to know when someone is truthful with their words. Men will enjoy the moment for what it is while it may take a woman months to finally feel emotionally connected. We live in an instantaneous world these days but relationships are far from that. They take time and patience, particularly if you are trying to build a successful one.
New relationships are a fun time. However, they can often end as quickly as they start. If you want you and your new pal to make it long term, do these 5 things:
Starting off with a new person can be a frustrating task. You are trying to learn who this person is while simultaneously being infatuated with who you want them to be. You need to be sure to ask questions and find out the simple things about them. You don't want to find yourself three months in and usure what their favorite color is. Also, communication allows you to set your boundaries and figure out each others intentions. Going with the flow is always nice but it’s also a good way to waste your time. We all come from different background but if you cannot effectively communicate with this person from the beginning, im sorry but you should probably run.
2. Don't put all your eggs in one basket
By this, I don't mean be a player. It means keep your options open until you are sure that someone is on the same page as you. I have made this mistake before when you cut off all your other suitors only to find the person you are mainly interested, isn’t as interested in you. Then, that leaves you back at square one. This also goes along with taking things slowly. There’s no need to rush and commit fully to someone after the third date. You can put more focus on one person but don't shut out everyone else so quickly.
3. Don’t stop your life
A lot of time when we get into relationships, we forget about who we are. The best relationships that I have had, are the ones where I still kept my life in tact. I didn't sacrifice all the things that I enjoyed doing. Instead, I continued to do the things I enjoyed but just made extra time for that person or included them in on it. Personally, I feel like for any long term relationship this is a must. Both individuals should still have their own life outside of the relationship. You should still hang out with friends, go hiking even if they don’t like it, or any other random thing. You should never stop what you like to do because of someone else. If you do this and they leave….what do you have?
4. Know who you are and what you desire
THIS IS MAJOR. Stop going into relationships when you are unsure who you are an what you desire. When you do this, you tend to ignore all the red flags that a person may show. You must be able to stand true in who you are to have an effective relationship. When someone leaves your life you should still be able to be you and do the things that you were before. We often let our relationships become so much of us that if you break up you almost forget how to breathe. Your partner should just be a bonus in your life. A good bonus that I should say. Self love will allow you to attract the person of your dreams because you will not allow anyone to treat you less than what you treat yourself.
This is another big one because relationships take time. We all have our own emotional baggage and past experiences that we have to unpack in the process of getting to know someone new. You don't want to rush into things too quickly and have them blow up right in front of your face. Patience can be a difficult thing, especially if you are in deep lust but remain mindful of how quickly you are moving things along. The key is to leave something to be desired. Don't give someone the milk before they have even bought the cow.
I always say that you can never lose when you are willing to open your heart up to love. People enter our lives for a purpose and for lessons. It takes a lot of strength to be able to love and allow yourself to be loved. If a relationship doesn't turn out the way that you expected, don’t fret. Take the good with the bad and keep pushing. All relationships are different, some may move very slow and others may move quickly. Just remain true to who you are and all the rest will follow.
What are your thoughts on new relationships? Do you enjoy them or do you find them an annoying process?